Wanted to write again..and hopefully momentous things are about to come..

It's been one long year in Kudat..and it's been 3 years tops in Sabah.

So many changes with my friends' life I see...browsing/perusing through these FB pages of yours.

Whatever bad things associated with FB; it has its merits.

FB are like snapshots of your life's important moments; of personal triumphs.

Your momentous occasions my friends; your weddings; your childbirths', your adventures; your journeys....
...they also fire up my passions; igniting flames inside me that I thought have long gone..buried.

For the past one month I have renewed my faith..re-discovered my zeal..or what Austin Powers would say..my mojo.

There are some things that I hope will come into fruition for me come this 2014..I hope that Allah will grant my wishes..may He find that I am worthy.

I hope I will be able to set aside time to write again.

Gosh! It feels good to write something again!

keep me in your prayers, my friends!

Till then...I see u when I see u.

The Milestones of One's Life

"If it is a son, we shall call him Haneef" -Mom and Dad-

"He is such a quiet baby" -an aunt-

"He will become a professor some day" -another aunt-

"He always give in to his sister" -yet another aunt (or was it the same previous aunt?)-

"The three rascals...partners-in-crime" -another aunt-

"If a child doesnt talk too much, that means he's thinking" -A Dad's friend-

"You wanna fight?" -A boy at kindergarten, while holding me up by the collars-

"Dad, I think I have fallen in love.." -First puppy love, 7 years old-

"How did she now that I liked her?" -Me, incredulous, 12 years old-
"Duh, it was so obvious..the way that you glance sideways at her during class..the whole class noticed, by the way.." -A dear friend at primary school-

"We dont like the way that you are easily stressed out and being angry at people.." -a dear friend at junior high-

"You have changed a bit Haneef..you are friendlier and more relaxed now.." -a dear friend at junior high-

"I want to get married as soon as possible...I dont want to retire and still have to support my children's education!" -a senior at high school-

"I am officially stepping down as Head Prefect..I cant shoulder the burden" -Me at high school-

"Cikgu (teacher), why even when I smile, I felt sad?" -Me-
"Because you don't smile from the heart, dear" -A dear teacher at high school-

"But I really do love her teacher..I think she's the one for me..there could not be anyone else for me!" -Me-
"(She's your ideal woman) when you are seventeen..only at seventeen" -Another dear teacher at high school-

"Remember this day..come what may..wherever our different paths take us...we will always be friends!" -A pledge between dear friends; last day of high school-

"Congratulations son..our appeal on your behalf have gotten you a place to study medicine in Indonesia... -Dad-

"You cant expect that everyone should follow your standards, your expectations. Everyone has different values. Not everyone is like you." -a dear friend at college-

"We are naming our son after you..we hope that some of your characteristics will rub on to our child" -Another dear teacher at high school, whom I regard as a second father-

"Havent you met someone special in your life?" -another aunt-
"Havent auntie" -me-
"That's so sad...." -that same aunt-

"Abang Haneef, way back in high school..you were my role model" - A former junior at high school-
"Sorry kiddo, the person that you idolized..was nothing more than an illusion..he is a mere shell now. Right now, YOU are far better than I am." -Me-
"I refused to believe that..a person could not have changed that much!" -that junior again-
"Maybe you are right...i hope you are right...." -Me-

"I believe that the day I am ready in Allah's eyes, I will meet my partner in life.." -Me at university-

"Never ever lose you confidence in front of your patients! If you cant find hear the sounds of blood pressure..dont say 'sorry Sir, but I cant find your blood pressure'! What will your patient think? Try and try again until you can hear them! -a dear friend at university-

"2 of our family members are planning to get hitched sometime next year..are you going to follow suit?" -a cousin-

"I believe that when God has put us along a certain path..in our case studying Medicine..we are meant to do just that..don't ever think you are not fit to become a doctor!................ If you could only be more positive about yourself..if your friends can see the good things in you..why cant you see them yourself?" -Another dear friend at university-

"Unspoken love to me..but present always every day of my life" -Mom, Dad, my sisters, my family, my
friends-

These are the meaningful quotes in my life that I have tried to recap..to remind myself and other people

The quotes for the future...remain to be seen..

Love Stanza (my first attempt at poetry)

'Twas a bright sunny day; but with the breeze, the heat is abated
That you first came into my life; by chance? or was it fated?
It was poetry in motion, that left me captivated


Something about you sets my heart aglow
Was it an instinct? a hunch? I cannot know
But I was taken by you from the word go


There's something about you (not Mary!); that have me spellbound
'Twas in your sanguinity & uninhibited character; and the cheeky warmth that is abound
And that fiery and brave spirit in standing your ground


Though that most strong women; preferred even stronger men
I do wish that for me; you make an exception
For eventhough I am gentle and meek outside; internally I am a man of great ambition & intention


It was written in the stars; by Allah's decree
You are not perfect; yet are good enough to complete me
I am very grateful that I have met thee


So, please, dear woman, a chance, perhaps, to prove my worthiness?
To prove that I can fill your life with happiness
To help navigate you through this life of uncertainty and craziness


Oh my dear; I do wish you would accept my feelings
Because it's been a while since I have been eating (but thank God I am still drinking!)
Dont leave me hanging here; dont leave me reeling


I will always work hard to be the man of your dreams
Although I am imperfect; I will never stop trying to be the top of the cream
I will never rest on my laurels; nor will stop at the seams


Oh, the woman of my dreams; the object of my affection
If you say yes; then I will be a very happy man; free off affliction
And my life will be filled with more conviction


Yet even if you say no; or you have met someone better
I will not begrudge you; nor I will be bitter
I will pray for your happiness; and hope you have...a better future


For if it turns out that it was not written in the stars; as I had predicted
There is a silver lining in all that Allah has decreed
Dont be down in the dumps just because you had been rejected


Rejection doesnt mean that you are useless or weak
It's just an issue of compatibility; and not of anyone's mistake
To be better with each relationship; so that eventually you will find someone suitable to your own make


I think I have go on for too long
Any more longer than I might just write a song
Thank you if you are still reading this (cant find any word that rhymes with ong)


Dont be worried if you are still single
Because Allah is just giving you the opportunity to mingle
Until one day you find that special somebody that sets your heart a-jingle


So, my friends, never lose hope, never lose heart, never lose trust
There is someone out there for each of us
May we all achieve happiness..Allah bless us!

Movie Review: Sang Pemimpi

Assalamualaikum & good morning.

"Bermimpilah, maka Tuhan akan memeluk mimpi-mimpimu"

"Ayahku, ayah juara satu seluruh dunia"

On 2010 New Year's Eve, I watched Sang Pemimpi (SP), an Indonesian movie based on a novel by the same name at the cinema. The delay in seeing SP was on purpose, because I prefer the queue for tickets to thin out quite a bit.

To say that SP is a good movie is an understatement. It is a brilliant movie, by a mile. One of the most memorable movies I have watched in 2009.

I have read the book by Andrea Hirata (AH), a brilliant masterpiece by its own accord and IMO the best book of the Laskar Pelangi tetralogy, and was curious as to what direction would producer Mira Lesmana (MR) & director Riri Riza (RR) take in transferring SP to the silver screen. MR & RR had always impressed me, ever since when I first saw their work as co-producers to Rudy Soedjarwo's Ada Apa Dengan Cinta.

MR & RR has done it again. Where Laskar Pelangi the movie has some kinks here & there (otherwise a good movie), SP is nearly faultless. MR & RR hit all the right notes, from the word go.

Some creative licence is always needed whenever a book adapted to a movie. You cant transfer all the ideas brick by brick, because what might work in the books might not work in the movies. The most important thing is the director is able to capture the book's essence and spirit in the movie. In this respect the movie doesn't disappoint.

SP is about daring to dream in the face of adversity, the importance of education & hardwork, the love between father & son, a teacher's role. The bittersweet love of the younger folks.

The camerawork is spectacular. I like the way that the camera is constantly changing it's focus, panning out from background view to the immediate view & vice-versa. The angles that the camerawork use are brilliant. Because every object has it's role in the movie. Some has symbolic meanings. In some scenes, no dialogue is needed. e.g. The dousing of fire and the releasing of the monkey at Arai's home...of moving on and cutting his ties with his past.

MR & RR's attention to detail is astounding. SP being a period piece (set in the 80's and 90's), they manage to convincingly recreate that time period.
The old rickety bicycles, the worn-out calendars, the weather-beaten name planks, the clothing, the hustle-bustle of a shanty town with people walking and cycling in the background, the old motorbikes...all managed to create that engrossing environment.

Music is also used effectively. It was never intrusive, and complement the scenes quite well, especially in the heart-touching scenes of Ikal and his father.

The acting is top-notch. All of the important characters are played convincingly by the actors. Especially: Ahmad Saifullah as the teenage Arai, Azwir Fitrianto as the teenage Jimbron, Mathias Muchus as Seman (Ikal's father), and Jay Widjajanto as Bang Zaitun. Arai was what I imagined him to be: roguish impish character but with a kind heart. Azwir managed to make Jimbron funny & likeable. Jay was spot on as the flamboyant outlandish singer, Bang Zaitun. But Mathias tops it all. His dialogues were few and far in between, but his character as a loving father was expressed by his mannerism & actions, a testament of Bp Mathias' skills as an actor.

And finally, the narrative is superb. The story managed to be: poignant, funny, touching, motivating at different times.

Funny: Jimbron's and Bang Zaitun's character, Arai trying to woo Zakiah Nurmala, the main trio's escapades from Bp Mustar..

Poignant and touching: Arai's intro as an orphan, Ikal's relationship with his father, Nurmi's scene, the friendship between Arai, Ikal, & Jimbron; ...

Motivating and uplifting: the importance of education, the roles of teachers (personified by Bp Mustar and Bp Balia), the desire to dream..

The only gripe I have was that the story felt a little weak in the final 15 minutes. The reaction of Ikal's parents to his letter was a bit out of character compared to the previous scenes, especially for Bp Seman. And the final scenes was a bit draggy (although it did end with a witty line.. ..^^)

But I truly enjoyed Sang Pemimpi.

No other movie have made me cry so earnestly.
No other movie have made me more fond of my father.
No other movie have made me more in touch with my Malay roots.
No other movie have made me more grateful that I have the opportunity to learn and be educated.
No other movie have made me more than ever to want to hope. To have a dream.

To become a Pemimpi like Arai.

That's how good Sang Pemimpi is.

Wassalam.... ^^v

Birthday party: analyze that ^^v

Assalamualaikum and good evening,

I suspected that if Allah hadn't decreed me to be a doctor, I would have made a good linguist. But I digress.

There are many schools of thought when it comes to categorizing people based on their general behaviour. I think (without any research) that most of them tend to divide people to four groups. Keirsey system divides people to Guardians, Rationalists, Artists, and Idealists.

The Four Temperaments (which have roots from the teachings of Hippocrates regarding humorism) on the other hand divides people to:

Sanguine: people person, short attention span, confident, loves to entertain, lively, livewire, fun-loving,spontaneous, extrovert
Choleric: Go-getter, charismatic, leader type, energetic, ambitious, irritable
Phlegmatic: laidback, compassionate, peacemaker, witty, observant, lazy, shy
Melancholic: Introvert, ponderer, thinker, fastidious, reflective, sentimental, depressed

The characteristics are not set in stone. Most people will have a combination of 2 or 3 types, but every body will have a dominating character type.

I attended a friend's birthday party today. Parties are a good way of seeing myriad of people interactions. When the party involves a large gathering of people, say more than 20 people, soon you will see during the course of that party, the formation of little islands of congregation. Subconsciously some people who have good chemistry will band together and mingle around.

There will those who'll be the centre of attentions, some who listened with rapt attention, some who are present physically but let their minds wander, some who observed other people, etc etc.

No prize guessing which type I am eh? hehe. I am a melancholist through and through. But previously I thought my breakdown was this: 70% melancholic, 20% sanguine, and 10% phlegmatic.

But after an evening at a friend's party, I reflected, and realized that maybe it's more like: 70% melancholic, 15% phlegmatic, 10% sanguine, and 5% choleric.

I have always marvelled at my own way of perceiving things. Thinking too much and in a convoluted complicated kind of way comes to me naturally, like breathing or eating.

When guys go to watch movies they do just that; watch movies. But I will find myself thinking about who is the director of that movie and how does this one stack up to his previous films, what was the main actor's previous movies, what would be the best lines from that movie that I would store in my brain and quote relentlessly, etc etc.

And when my friends are enjoying themselves at a friend's birthday party, I was categorizing the guests according to 4 temperaments. hehe. Scary...

And then another unique reflection comes to mind... "I am afraid that in this personality of data-amassing, number-crunching, and hard analyzing..there is no place for a soul-mate (read:women) to understand me"

Lho? koq mikirnya gitu sih? (huh? why do you have that way of thinking)

haha.

Just random thoughts in a grey evening.

Wassalam...

p/s: Happy birthday Nani! May ur adventures ahead are filled with vibrant colours of joy! ^^v

Leading a simple fulfilling life

Assalamualaikum & evening people..

People who know me say: I think too much, I complicate matters, I worry too much.

Guilty on all charges. (^^)

But allow me to be optimistic. Indulge me.

I like to think that I have improved by leaps and bounds over these past few years. Alhamdulillah.

The key to be happy in life is to be grateful.

We human beings are always led astray by our inherent greed & envy. These 2 characters are considered in Christen-dom as part of the 7 deadly sins. With good reason.

If we can cast away our greed & envy towards other people, we will feel better.

Be grateful with what you have, & never think less of yourself. Never think that you are useless and replaceable. For in the grand scheme of things, each & everyone of us is important in this world, and have our own roles to play; our own niche to fill. To each of us; his/her own unique place in this world.

Count your blessings people! And never give up hope! (^^)

"The world is a lovely place and worth fighting for. I believe with the 2nd part"
-Morgan Freeman; Seven-

Wassalam.

The Sabine Chronicles 4: A dear friend's visit

previous part of the story...It was a cold night

A wet and misty Sunday morning.

The living room radio is fittingly belting out Maroon 5’s Sunday Morning.

“Sunday morning rain is falling…steal some cover… share some skin…”

Hazami smiles wrily. Rain is definitely falling alright. Bed covers are aplenty. But there’s decidedly no skin. Unless it was his own.

He’s expecting company. The table on the patio is set and ready. Nothing that’s too fancy. French toast, with marmalade aside. Fried eggs. Cups which are twins of each other brimming with ground coffee. Wisps of steam arise from the cups and dissipate to the cold air.

Presently the doorbell rang. “Assalamualaikum” chirped the built-in greeting.

“Waalaikumussalam. Come Sabine, let’s greet him.” Sabine abruptly rose and stretched. “He better bring along some treats or else,” seemed to be the feline’s body language. Hazami chuckled, more to himself.

In the doorway stood Azzim. His dear friend since secondary school days.

“Nice of you to drop by, Azzim. How was the commute from Penang yesterday?How’s the business talk?”
“Both was pleasant. Likewise Zam. It’s been ages.”
“Come, I have set the table for two.” “Meowww,” Sabine protested. “Well, two and a half.” Hazami added apologetically. “Haha, how are you faring, Sabine?” Azzim petted Sabine affectionately. “Here’s some Whiskie. Tuna. Your favourite.” Azzim produced a small pack of cat food. Sabine purred approvingly.

The three of them sat at the table, Sabine at the floor curling with 2 bowls of milk and tuna Whiskie.

Hazami and Azzim spent the greater part of the hour talking about work, old friends, goings-on of the world. They have a lot to catch up about each other. Work and, in Azzim’s case, family, have been occupying them both these days. Azzim, a botanical researcher with USM in Penang, Hazami, young GP doctor upon the throes of registrarship.

“So, you are set on specializing in Medicine?” “If there’s still empty seats for the scholarship from UKM, eitherwise…I am keeping my fingers crossed,” Hazami said. “Other specializations?” “Not really into them much. In fact, back when I was a lowly intern, an OG specialist appraised me physically and said, Kid, you get Medicine stamped all over you. Haha, no, I think Medicine is the best option for me. Either it or I am looking at another opening next time. I am not in a hurry.”

“Well, you know best..”said Azzim. “How is Rafidah and Raudhah?”asked Hazami. “Mom and daughter? Alhamdulillah, they are healthy. It’s been 2 months now since Raudhah was born.” Azzim mused “That’s good to hear. And your Tiger?” “Azri?Scraped his knee for the umpteenth time last week.” Hazami smiled, and added, “Boys of his age are always adventurous. I broke my own forearm bone when I was also 5.”
“Yes, yes. Haha. And it seems only just yesterday I was a doting first-time father.”
And these close friends laughed heartily. And after the peals of laughter subsided, a moment of silence. Sabine is lapping silently at the milk bowl.

Azzim took the initiative, “So, how are you holding up?” “Hmm? Meaning…?” Hazami replied quizzically.

“Come on Zam, you know what I mean. I…don’t take this the wrong way Zam. But don’t you feel lonely? This place you have here, it is nice and cozy. But it is missing something. Don’t you… don’t you want to give it another try?”

Hazami smiled, but it was a tired smile. “Well, I do have Sabine. She’s good company. And Mak, Ayah, and my dear sisters and their families, my friends, all are just a phone away, if it gets really boring..” Hazami patted Sabine absent-mindedly. “Besides, I am busy with work. I don’t have time to go anywhere..”

Azzim sighed. “I’m just worried for you mate, that’s all. You are the only one you know…who are still not hitched.” “Yes, previously it was a contest between me and Hamidah and Zamani right? Haha,” Hazami laughed, but his laughter died abruptly when he saw Azzim’s concerned look. “Well, thanks Zim for your concern. It’s not that I haven’t thought about it. It’s just that I have been used to being on my own, that I have adapted to it. Now I cook my own meal. If I grew tired of my cookings, there’s always eat-outs. Cleaning up has always been my forte. There are many more books, countless movies waiting for me to dig my teeth into. My days are occupied to the max, that I never have the time to feel alone.”

Azzim eyed Hazami intently. “Is that really true? I don’t think you yourself believe in what you said just now. I know you brother. Maybe more than anyone else.”
Hazami sighed a deep long sigh. “I suppose you are right. Maybe it was my own self that I was trying so hard to convince. This house…” Hazami waved his hand around, “…needs its Queen. But you, Zim, of all people should understand. I am tired. It’s always the same with each woman. They will always say: You think too much. You are not confident enough. You are just too childish. You are too analytical. You make a mountain out of a mole-hill. You are fretful. You are not old enough. You are just too weird.. And the list goes on. Not to mention all those cheatings and lyings. That wardrobe there is bursting open.”

Azzim nodded sympathetically. Hazami had that curious habit of storing an iconic item which signifies each and everyone of his relationship in one mahogany wardrobe in his house. It is fitted with see-through glass panels, 1 metre by half a metre, with 3 rows. And it’s full to the brim. Letters, dried up flower petals, pendants.

“I…..I don’t know what to expect anymore. I know that time is not on my side. At 34, I can’t elect to be choosy. Do you think that I have been…well….too selective?”asked Hazami.

Azzim closed his eyes and reflected. All those run of bad lucks. Improper timing. Being hoodwinked a couple of times by money-grabbing women. Not the right situation. And Azzim thought, “No.” Hazami was always accommodating of other people’s faults. He was willing to accept folks for who they are. And Azzim answered likewise. “No, you are not.” Azzim added, “But never give up hope, Zam. Never give up hope, I implore you. You are a special one in my eye. Never thought of less of yourself. Maybe…maybe Allah saved the best for you, for last.”

Hazami smiled, “Ameen. Thank you. I never really gave up hope.”

Then the conversation continued for a little while. Until it’s time to leave.

“Thanks for the meal. Keep in touch…and keep your spirits up.” “I will Zim. I will. Regards to Rafidah, wouldn’t you?” “Of course I will. Assalamualaikum. Bye Sabine.” “Waalaikumussalam.” “Purr,” come Sabine’s answer. Upon that cue, Azzim and his Peugeot, was gone. Back to Penang.

“Well, Sabine, time to clean up.” “Meoww.”

That night, while Hazami was taking in the wondrous night sky peppered with glowing stars, through the glass roof, he said a silent prayer. “O Allah, let there be no more new additions to that mahogany wardrobe. I can’t afford to buy a new one.”

He smiled, and drifted to Morpheous’ realm again. At that armchair by the bookcase, to the tune of Celine Dion’s When I Fall in Love….

“When I fall in love…it would be forever..or I’ll never fall in love..”
“And the moment that…I feel that…you feel that way too…is when I fall in love..with…you….”

He drifted more and more deep in his slumber, but with a difference tonight.

With hope.

The Sabine Chronicles 3: It was a cold night...

previous part of the story...Not taking his own medicine

So cold.

The car's thermometre implied that the air outside was 22 Celsius.

He stopped at the local 7-11 to grab some milk.

"Evening Dr!" chirped Grace the cashier. "Evening.." was the tired reply. "Tired" was strengthened by the panda eyes, that haggard appearance, the 2-day shirt. The unruly sorry excuse for a hair.

Tired! Was the unanimous equivocal statement.

"Are those Good Day ones in stock, Grace dear?" "Sorry, sold out for the day. But the Dutch Lady's are at the back."

He cringed. Dutch Lady is a bit expensive. All the same, he took two of the Lady's.

"Working late Dr?" "At the end of a 2-day shift. Going home for a while to have my 40 winks," he replied with a wry smile.

"So, Dr, when is our big date?" Grace said with mischievous eyes. He smiled. "If I have told u, I have said it a million times. I am too old for you. Wouldn't want to be charged with a minor."

"Aww, too bad. I was hoping that we can go to somewhere cozy..." "Bye Grace!Nite!" Grace's advances was cut short.

That last 1 km drive home was uneventful. "Damn that Grace!" Always teasing him. Another tired smile. Rounding that last cul-de-sac, parking his Toyota Vios.

"Assalamualaikum. Sabine! I'm home!"

Down came Sabine from upstairs, prancing gracefully. Quite the feminine grace. With that haughty blue eyes. Colour of lapis lazuli. Striking.
Air of confidence. Like she commanded the room. Sucking the very air into her. Like an endless vortex.
That silky hair. Soft to the touch.
Those lovely curves. Shapely.

"There you are! Do you miss me? Hope you have eaten those dishes that I've prepared for you." He stroked her hair. "I've got you some milk" he added. She eyed him thoughtfully.

And he went to prepare himself his first square meal in days. Nothing sashy. Just fried rice with omelette. The one that everyone can whip up in 20 mins. He also cooked for his dear Sabine.

They had a simple dinner together. Of course, Sabine must have her dinner with milk. All the while he was regaling her about that difficult specialist Dr. Ifrinda, or about Puan Malika's improving conditions, or Azzim's new son, or Angah's salary increase, Adik's new job, Dad's new golf set, and about Mum's impending retirement.

He was content after that. For Sabine is very a good listener. She makes the speaker feel appreciated.

He cleaned things up. For eventhough Sabine is a good listener, she was no good in tidying things up. Some might consider that a fatal error. It was fine by him.

And then he went to his armchair by the hi-fi.
Next to the armchair was a bookcase stuffed to the brim with books. All kinds of books imagineable. Most of the books are well-worn. Testament that he has read them countless times.

He plucked a cd into that old hi-fi. Out came the classic song I Dont Wanna Miss A Thing by Aerosmith.

To the tune of that song he picked Tere-Liye's Bidadari Surga from the bookshelf. Tere-Liye is an Indonesian writer. His writings are about slice-of-life. Perseverance. Hope. Struggle.

He read it for the umpteenth time. While absent-mindedly stroking Sabine's hair. Steve Tyler's voice in his ears.

Past the half-hour mark, he fell asleep on that armchair. Upon closer inspection, that armchair too seemed well-worn. As if the owner constantly fell asleep while reading there. And that was the case actually. Has always been for years now. He rarely sleeps in his bedroom anymore. Preferring this sanctuary of armchair/hi-fi/bookcase to the splendor of his bedroom.
He is more contented this way.

"I dont wanna close my eyes...I dont wanna fall asleep..coz I miss you baby..and I dont wanna miss a thin'.."

But he did fall asleep.

Sabine, seeing him slipping into Morpheus' realm, slowly yawned herself. But she was not quite tired. She's not diurnal anyway. Nocturnal is her biology. And then she pranced on her four legs.

Four??

Yes, four. For she is not Homo sapiens. More like Felis domesticus.

The book Bidadari Surga slowly falls from his lap. The upturned page is page 290. A sentence commanded our attention.

"Ia sudah terbiasa dengan kesendiriannya..."

continued in...A dear friend's visit

First 2 months in clinical rotations...

Assalamualaikum,

I started my clinical rotations of 2 years on 4th May 2009 (which is also Adik's birthday, that's 2 pivotal moments on 1 date).

Due to luck of the draw, my first posting was Obstetrics and Gynecology (henceforth OG) department for 2 months.

Just finished OG. Got a break for 1 week before entering ENT (Ear Nose Throat) department.

Havent got any pictures as mementos of my exp in OG. I am just not a picture-snapper. But "a picture is worth more than a thousand word", or so they say. Must change this habit :) . The dearth of pictures in my collection also means the dearth of memories.

Entering clinical rotations (henceforth CR) means being a member of a permanent group of colleague. All of the students in my batch are broken down to small groups of 11 to 12 people. Big dept like OG will constitute a permanent combination of 2 groups.

Since through the theoretical years foreign students have a different schedule than Indonesian students, this is my first time of truly mixing with my Indonesian friends. Alhandulillah, I can get along well with my group members. (which is a given, considering that these are the people I will work with for the next 2 years).

So, the past 2 months have taught me a lot of things, and got me thinking very hard.

The moment you wore that white coat, it entails a lot of things. Responsibility, accountability. People trusted you a lot. And if you are not deserving of that white coat, you must buck up or ship out. Every time I wore that white coat, I felt undeserving. Feeling that I have to be better as a doctor.

Being Sensitive to All Human Tragedies Irrespective of Race, Nations, or Creed: Part 1

Assalamualaikum and good morning,

Without meaning to make light of the gravity of situation in the recent Gaza conflict, which in itself is deserving of our unbridled attention, there are other plights afflicting groups of people which we might not be aware of, due to lack of media coverage, because their plights are "not important to the political global landscape".


First, there are the plight of the Rohingyas, an ethnic group of mostly Islam by religion which traditionally lives in Arakan, in northern Myanmar. They are a marginalised community in Myanmar, deprived of their ancestral land and rights for Myanmar citizenship.
Prof. Gabriele Marranci wrote about their plight in three of his articles (in chronological order) : The other, invisible suffering of Burma; Rohingya Odyssey: a silent cultural genocide?; and Rohingya Muslims and injustice: a security issue? . Their plight are not even listed in the list of ongoing conflicts worldwide in Wikipedia.

Excerpts from Marranci's articles:

"Rohingya Muslims are victims of their lack of strategic value, both for their native Southeast Asia and the wider international community. Similarly to the tragic reality of Black Muslims in Darfur, their lives have no economic, or political, value for the rest of our cynical world."

"It is clear that the Islamic concept of ummah has little value when compared to political interests. Rohingya Muslims in Bangladesh, as in other Muslim countries such as Indonesia or Malaysia , are no more welcomed than in Thailand. Rohingya Muslims have protested, even recently, and tried to make more and more people aware, especially other ‘brothers’ and ’sisters’, of their intolerable condition. Yet who is really listening to them?"

"...the majority of Muslims, even those so ready to violently scream and shamefully misbehave in the name of a free Palestine, will not whisper even a single word to help these ‘brothers’. How many Muslims have heard an imam mention the name Rohingya during his supplication (Du’a) for Afghanis, Palestinians, Iraqis and even perhaps the Chechen muhajedeen?"

" ...many Muslim governments...still play the ‘Muslim ummah’ card, as in the case of the Danish Cartoons, when it is needed for their political games - but never when ordinary Muslims, like the Rohingya, without political value to barter with, find themselves oppressed."

"...the discussion is not about them, as human beings or to address their issues, but rather about how to get rid of them as quickly as possible."

Next, is the Darfur conflict raging in Sudan. Last year, the conflict managed to grab headlines for a stretch of time, before being relegated to the dustbins of journalism. The conflict is between people of African-Arab descent (specifically the Janjaweeds, allegedly helped by the Sudanese government) and the Black Africans living in Darfur province of Sudan. UN estimated that around 300 000 people had died. Further information can be gleaned from Wikipedia and the BBC.

The Gaza conflict has ceased for the time being, but the Sri Lankan conflict is still ongoing. The conflict is between the Sri Lankan Government (dominated by the Sinhalese) and the Liberation Tigers of Tamil Eelam (LTTE), who fights for an independent state for the Tamil minority. Since the conflict initially erupted in 1983, 80 000 people has been killed. Now, after years of fighting, it seemed that the balance of power has shifted to the Sri Lankan Army, who has occupied most of north-eastern Sri Lanka (LTTE power base) and pushed the LTTE to a strip of land there.
However, about 200 000 civilians (est.) who are mostly Tamils and not affiliated to LTTE are still trapped in the crossfire.

I was drawn to these conflicts, because it seemed to me that the immediate circle of people around me are sometimes selective in tuning their compassion to the victims of human conflicts.

(to be continued...) Part 2

Broadening Your Horizons About the Gaza Incident

Assalamualaikum and good evening,

Since I havent been actively blog-hopping for the past few months, when I do blog-hop for a few hours today, digging up blog archives, there are some noteworthy articles that piqued my interest, and I would like to share with you guys.

The first group of articles is about the current Gaza conflict between Israel and Palestine (going on for close to 60 years now).

My heart goes out to all the innocent civilians who died or were maimed during the conflict, irrespective of Palestinians or Jews. Contrary to popular belief, not all Jews support the active war effort perpetrated by the Israeli government against the Palestinians, although I cant vouch as to the number of these peace-minded Jews. But it can be said that most of the casualties during the 6 decades of conflict have been Palestinians.

Read these articles with an open heart.

Prof. Gabriele Marranci argues that the conflict might be a way for both Kadima and Hamas to appease their respective citizens, trapping them in a cycle of death.
He also argues that if we truly analyze the conflict, it is a political conflict, not a religious one.

Mustafa Akyol wrote that the main problem is that both sides seemed to think that their cause is the right one, and the other side is the evil one.

Tun Dr Mahathir also wrote a series of rebuttals to the claims made by the Jews regarding the conflict.

I hope that you will gain something from them.

Wassalam.

Entering Clinical years...Finally!

Assalamualaikum and good evening,

If my blog page is considered a bookshelf, festoons of cobwebs will be dangling from its corners.

The past few months have been very crucial for me. I was finishing my theoretical years, culminating with the important exam of Penilaian Berbasis Kompetensi Ko-Asisten, aka PBKK for short in Indonesian language. In English, roughly it translates to Med Interns Assesment Based on their Competency.

What makes PBKK more terrifying to us UGM med students was due to its nature of not relying on written answers, but rather your skills and ability to cope with pressure. Basically, you have to perform a series of clinical skills (anamnesis, delivering a baby, suturing skins, etc. ) in a limited time-frame while having your lecturers breathing up your neck like vultures feasting upon carrions.

Well, I did exaggerate a bit, hehe.

Add to the fact that you never know what your exact questions would be until the moment you enter the exam room, e.g. we know that Room 1 is for Emergency Cases, but will we get CPR and ET, or CPR with Splint? How about Integrated Patient Management (IPM)? Will I get the comparatively lightweight TB, or will I get the devious CHF?

So, at the end of the day, it's a combination of hard work and pure luck.
Some will work their a** off for this exam and still flunked it because they get the 'perfectionist' examiners who expect you to do everything to a tee, or because they get the HIV case, or because their nerves just fail them.
Others with less work rate might find the exam plain sailing and pass because they have 'kind' examiners (oh, they are still students...still learning..as long as they don't mess up too much...), or they might get that TB or Malaria case.

Oh, the PBKK was on 24 February, 4 days ago. Results will be out by 14 March.
If I pass it, Insya Allah I am eligible to enter the clinical rotations come 23 March.
If I don't, then I will have to wait another month before I had another go for PBKK remedial.
Yup, that's right, another month of waiting while your friends are practicing at the hospitals.
With a failure rate of between 50 to 60% for first-timers, I am keeping my fingers crossed.

What to do between 24/2 and 14/3 you say? Well, I am currently back in Malaysia now for 2 weeks break. Figured that since in clinical years my longest holidays would be 1 week breaks, I am spending time with my family now. Clinical years would be close to 2 years before completion.

Hope that me and my fellow batchmates will all be part of the first intake for clinical rotations, Insya Allah.

But for now, a break. The calm before the storm.... :)

Wedding Tag

1) Take a recent picture of yourself or take a picture of yourself right NOW!.
2) DON’T change your clothes, DON’T fix your hair…just take a picture.
3) Post that picture with NO editing.
4) Post these instruction with your picture.

ok, so I might have straightened my hair a bit. It was a tangled mess.

1.How old are you?
23.

2. Are you single?
Yes.

3. In what age do you think you’ll get married?
Probably between 31 to 35. Allah may have other plans though.

4. Do you think you’ll be marrying the person you are with now?
I dont understand the phrase "the person you are with now". Friends? Special someones? If it's the former, maybe. If it's the latter, then I am still unlucky in that department.

5. If not, who do you want to marry?
A woman who shares the same goal and vision in life as me. A person whom I can understand & appreciate, and vice versa.

6. Do you want a garden/beach wedding, or the traditional wedding?
Garden wedding.

7. Your ideal motif?
Colour theme is white and light blue. Dashes of peach would be nice. Scent of lilies and lavender.

8. Where do you plan to go on a honeymoon?
Japan, under the sakura trees. Or wherever my wife preferred.

9. How many guests do you think you’ll invite?
around 500 to 800.

10. Do you want an extravagant wedding or a simple wedding?
Somewhere in the middle ground, not too extravagant as to be wasteful, and not as simple as to be meaningless.

11. Do you want the traditional vows or something you’d make up on your own??
Something of our own creation.

12. How many layers of cake do you want to have?
5 layers.

13. Do you prefer having your reception at a hotel or at a simple place?

Simple place. A hotel usually will render the atmosphere to be soulless.

14. When do you want to get married, evening or morning?
Morning. At the break of dawn. Signifying a great beginning of hope.

15. You’d rather have your reception outdoors or indoors?
Outdoors is the preference.

16. Do you like a grand entrance for your groom/bride?
If she consented to it. Probably try to convince her anyway. Would like to make her feel special.

17. Name the song/tune you’d like played at your wedding?
I Hear You Everywhere by Tanaka Rie, Tercipta Untukku by Ungu, Destiny by Jim Brickman & Jordan Hill, Super Trouper by ABBA, I Dont Wanna Miss A Thing by Aerosmith, When You Say Nothing At All by Ronan Keating, You'll Be In My Heart by Phil Collins, Keabadian Cinta by Anuar Zain, Belaian Jiwa by Innuendo, Kau Ilhamku by Man Bai, Rumahku Syurgaku and Selamat Pengantin Baru by Hijjaz, and Cari Pasangan by Rabbani.

18. Are you a morning person or a night person?
Morning person.

19. Do you want a solemn ceremony or a light one?
Solemn ceremony.

20. What age do you want to get married?
Repeat question..Refer no.3..Ideally will be 26.

21. Describe your ideal husband/wife.

A woman who shares the same goal and vision in life as me. A person whom I can understand & appreciate for what she is (warts and all), and vice versa.

22. Do you prefer fine dining or just the normal spoon & fork/knife?
Never a fan of fine dining anyway. Its too much of a hassle. Normal please.

23. Champagne or red wine?
Hehe. Apple juice?

24. Honeymoon right after the wedding or days after the wedding?
Right after.

25. Money or household item?
No preferences. Appreciate all gifts.

26. Who will pay for the bills?
Going Dutch here.

27. Are you ready for married life?
I am not a good judge as to that. Having said that, I think that I have lots of thing in myself that I have to work upon and change, before embarking on the road to matrimony.

28. Do you think you will still be a virgin until u get married?
Definitely.

29. Will you always be true to your wife/husband?
God-willing, yes.

30. How many kids do you like?
4 or 5 would be nice.

31. A new house for a newly wed or an old one?
No preferences, so long as it's nice, cozy, and manageable.

32. Will you celebrate silver wedding, gold wedding, or diamond wedding?
God-willing, yes.

33. What kind of cuisine would you like for your wedding?
Oriental.

34. Will you record your honeymoon in a cd or dvd?

Yes, I will. For future memories.

Life of the Morally Grey

Assalamualaikum & good evening,

In the fictive world, writers are wont to delineate their integral characters into clear-cut personalities of good & evil. White againsts black.

Rowling gave us the opposing forces of Harry Potter & Voldemort, Tolkien fleshes out the antagonism of Aragorn & Sauron, Lucas spun a story of Luke Skywalker against the Emperor.

But what strikes me is, us real-life characters, are not easily classified into black & white. More often than not, it is likely grey. That is why sometimes I find it hard to relate to these black or white characters. Because they may at times seemed unrealistic in the real setting. The white characters are sometimes holier-than-thou, uptight, preachy. The black characters are hell-bent on destruction, & being evil for evil’s sake.


Perhaps realizing this, the aforementioned writers did include grey characters in their literary works. Rowling dishes out Snape, an ambiguous character, whose true intentions are only revealed towards the end of the magnum opus, in The Deathly Hallow. Snape’s actions was mainly motivated by his undying love to a certain character. Tragic doesn’t even describe Snape’s story. Tolkien put forth the character Boromir, the son of the Steward of Gondor, who was seduced by the power of the One Ring, believing that he can wield it to destroy the evil that is Sauron. Lucas introduced to us the tragic Darth Vader, who was turned into a monstrous being to save his wife.

Maybe, because in these grey ones, I see the most correct way to describe humanity. These grey characters stumble in their lives’ path, make mistakes. But at the same time, they sometimes do acts of good. There is always the question of redemption.

Which is actually similar to the stories of most of us, right?

Because in the end, Snape eventually helped Dumbledore & Harry to bring about the downfall of Voldemort, Boromir died at Amon Hen defending the Hobbits, & Darth Vader threw the Emperor to his death by the core reactor. These men have sinned, because they make choices that they thought was the best. But they turned out right in the end.

So, don’t be hard on yourself if you make mistakes. At the cost of sounding a bit lame, “to err is human, to be perfect is divine”. What is more important, you learn from your mistakes.

Wassalam. Happy Eid Adha to all Muslims.

p/s: Sorry Dayah. I made your tag later. Been a bit busy now.

My Bedrock

Assalamualaikum & good evening,

I wonder why I never posted about my family before. They are such an integral part of my life. I am what I am, because of their continued love & support.

Ayah, you have taught me to stand up for myself, and never flinch at life's challenges. You are the source of my admiration. If I even have half of your qualities, I will become a greater person than I am now.

Emak, words cannot express the sacrifice and love you have given to me all these years. There could never be a more understanding, a more loving Mom. I hope that I can repay your deeds by becoming a very good person.

Angah and Adik, thank you for being such good sisters. Over the years we have gone through so much. It has always been my greatest fear that I have not played the part of a big brother as good as I had envisaged. I hoped that my fear is baseless. I hoped that I have been a good role model for you, my dear sisters.

I just arrived in Jogja yesterday.

Somehow, my farewell with my family this time weighs heavily on my heart. Greater than usual. There's more than the usual tinge of sadness.

There's a heartfelt longing for them this time around.

Ya Allah, tempatilah mereka dalam kasih sayang-Mu.

Today is A Gift

Assalamualaikum & good evening,

There comes a time when a person pulls all the stops & examine how his life has been going up until that point.

If it was my case, I have pulled all the stops countless times.

Friends have said that I am fretful, that I think too much.

Too burdened by past regrets, too mired with what's too come.

Like Master Oogway say to Po in Kungfu Panda, "You are too concerned with what was & what will be." but Oogway then continued, "Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. But today is a gift. That's why it is called the present."

Once heard during a Friday sermon:
"The most successful person is he who has no regrets of his past actions, is contented with what he is now, and doesnt worry about the future"
I guess I am not successful then. Terribly not successful.

If I had done things differently in days past, would I change for the better?

The challenges of the future, will I be ready to face them head-on?

Have I accomplished what I always dream of?

Ya Allah, tabahkanlah hatiku. Tunjukkanlah aku ke jalan yang Kau redhai.

15 facts about me...

Assalamualaikum... & good day,

Well, in the spirit of satiating my dear friend NK, and at the risk of my blog becoming another time-forgotten blog *hint hint*wink wink*...well, here goes...

Rules :
1. Each player of this game starts off with 15 weird things/habits/little known facts about yourself.
2. People who get tagged need to write a blog of their own 15 weird things/habits/little known facts as well as state this rule clearly.
3. At the end, you need to choose 10 people to be tagged and list their names.
4. No tags back!!

Okay here we go:

1. I like cute animals. Cats, rabbits, hamsters, ...even puppies!

2. My room's neatness is the outward expression of my state of mind. Neat = good state, messy = demotivated, I-dont-care-anymore attitude.

3. I am a sucker for romantic comedies, which are hard to come by these days. Oh yes.. Sleepless in Seattle, You've Got Mail, While You Were Sleeping, My Best Friend's Wedding!

4. Having said that, I dont dig horror movies. Or sickening stuff. You know. Saw and Final Destination series for example. Or Child's Play. 'Coz my brain will replay the sickening moments for weeks.

5. I give names to my things that I'm really attached. Oh yes. I am typing this on Athena, & I go to campus with my Humaira'. Oh yes...

6. I sucks at drawing things. Wouldnt make a good partner in Win, Lose, or Draw.

7. I recalled that I watched M.A.S.K cartoon as a child. Nope, not the green face Mask. I am talking M.A.S.K with T-Bob the robot, a baddie named Mayhem, n vehicles which could change to weapon systems. Weird, none of my friends seems privy about the show.

8. I was never involved in a fist-fight. Not ever. Weird...

9. First having major dislocation of my bone or tendon, was when I was 4 I think. Was trying to reach for the remote while standing on my tricycle. Hey, I was 4....

10. Lime juice rulezzz.....always...

11. Back when they were young, my 2 sisters were always bickering, even in the family car. So I will always sit in the middle of the back seat, on family outings. Yup, Big Bro / Berlin Wall. They made up now.

12. Never received a love letter. Never been on a date. Never been in a relationship. (Do all these count as one? haha.)

13. Like to memorize movie lines, book lines, song lyrics, esp the ones which rivet my mind. Capture my attention. Fascinates me. & it's not a conscious effort. It just happens.

14. Had my first crush when I was 7. Since then, must have gone through like 20 crushes. 1 love letter. 1 rejection.

15. I am actually a lazy-bum & not studious. But most of my friends have these weird notions that I am a nerd (which is the only true part) who buried himself in books 24-7. My close
associates will beg to differ. But I do want to be studious & hardworking. haha.

There. . After reading them myself, I realized, not such an interesting person after all. Oh well.
Wassalam.
Cheerios!

Sepi...best Malaysian film in years...

(disclaimer : the pictures are taken from Mr Fadz's blog, tontonmovie.)

Assalamualaikum & good morning,

During my recent holidays in Malaysia, I managed to catch Kabir Bhatia's latest offering, Sepi. By a unique turn of events, I end up going alone to see it. Prior to coming back to Malaysia, I don't know that Mr Kabir was working on a new movie. So, a few days after I arrived home, when I first noticed the vibes about Sepi, my interest was immediately piqued. Adding the fact that it has a strong ensemble cast, a who's who of the Malaysian industry, really drives me to see it. And the fact that I never went to the cinemas to watch a Malaysian movie is saying something. (Not even Cinta, Mr Kabir's previous work, which I only watch on cds).

If I am not mistaken, the production team is similar to Cinta. Back in screenplay, is Mr Kabir's wife, Nik Samira Nik Yusoff and ARA (Abdul Rahman Ahmad), & Madnor Kassim handling the camerawork.

Cinta, for me, is a good movie, but its weaknesses (not-so-flowing-storyline, uneven quality of acting, some implausible plot keys) manage to drag down its considerable strengths (stellar performance by Rahim Razali, Fatimah Abu Bakar, Nanu Baharuddin, Rashidi Ishak; excellent soundwork & camerawork), so that the end result is only good, but not excellent.

I am happy to say that Mr Kabir has improved by leaps and bounds in Sepi. The storyline as a whole, is tight, with less plot holes & occasional leaps of logic this time around. For the most part, the flow of the story is smooth, unlike Cinta, which does has some cringe-moments. (snatch-thief scene for e.g.) The dialogue is not wooden, and the cast, from the main characters right down to the supporting cast (which include the likes of Louisa Chong & Dian P Ramlee) perform their roles admirably. At the very least, they act adequately.

If the cinematography in Cinta was excellent, then the camerawork here will blow you away. The shots are very beautiful, and I sense a Malaysian aura permeates the whole movie. For once, I am proud of the way that the Malaysian way of life is portrayed by the movie. The wedding scene at kampung, the back alleys of low-cost houses, the KL cityscape from a glass window, the kitchen romantic scene between Afdlin & Vanida, the jogging tracks at the park... some scenes dont even have dialogues..because such is the strength of the camera shots...that the message is already conveyed to the audience..kudos to Kabir & Madnor.

The sound department dont disappoint either. They provide a nice complement to the story, & sometimes sets the mood for the scenes. Evocative, stirring, the movie will lost most of its charm & drive if not for the music. The use of Malay songs is also heartening, which shows that you dont have to rely on foreign songs, esp Westerns, to give an emotional impetus.

Sepi paints three story arcs, which progresses independently throughout most of the movie, but they do meet at a certain pivotal point, i.e. a car accident. 2 of the stories lead up to the accident, while one story starts from the accident. After the accident, the stories continues on their separate ways. Each of the story involves a love triangle (sort of), with one character being the focus of attention.



The first story revolves around Adam (Afdlin Shauki), a 30+ successful chef working in Kuala Lumpur (KL), who are unmarried and still single. His far relative, Suzie (Nasha Aziz), which is a bit eccentric & crazy, has always chased after Adam since childhood, but he didnt reciprocate that feelings. One day, he has a chance meeting with Ilyana (Vanida Imran), a wedding planner. Could she be the one that he has longed for so long?

To me, this story arc belongs to Afdlin. His acting is the best in the movie. He can portray humour and sadness in the same sentence. You can really feel his frustations, his sadness of being lonely. Vanida & Nasha's actings are good too, but dont leave an impression. Vanida's character seems a bit aloof sometimes, but there's no denying that she has a good chemistry with Afdlin. Their scenes together, pulls at the heartstrings...elicits feelings of longings.. Some reviewers praised Nasha's acting. To be fair, I am not adept in assessing eccentric characters (like Johnny Depp's characters), but she's a joy to watch.

The second story concerns about Sufi (Tony Eusoff), who lost his wife in the car accident. He blames himself for his wife's death, & for not expressing his love to his wife, and taking her for granted. Wrecked by guilt, he jogs daily to forget the pain, and he neglected his son. But a chance encounter with a mysterious lady,Marya (Eja) at the park, gives him hope again, and made him care about his son. Will Sufi ever find a second love?

If compared to Adam's storyline, Sufi's story is morally challenging, esp in a Malaysian context. The issues thrown about includes, whether you should be faithful to your spouse, if you really think you are meant for another. Marya is sad, because her marriage to Zain (Riezman Khuzaimi) is childless. Sufi make some overtures to Marya, but Marya still loves her husband. They decided eventually, that they will wait. For the time when they can be together.

For me, this story has the most leaps of logic, and some jarring or cringe-moments. Initially, I was taken in by Sufi, sympathizing in his plight, but midway through the story, I was a bit disgusted by Sufi's actions, which includes trying to pry another man's wife. However, the story redeems itself in the later parts of the story, which casts Sufi as a selfless man, and maybe, tragic. Acting-wise, Tony's performance is adequate, but not stellar. He doesnt portray the part of a widower quite well. Riezman's acting is adequate. He lacks screen time for me to make a connection. Eja could have the best acting in this story, but her scenes doesnt flesh her out too much. If only there were more of her.


The final story, centers around Imaan (Baizura Kahar) a college student, who writes a play named Sepi. She has a steady boyfriend, Khalif (Pierre Andre), who is an introvert. A "casanova", Ian (Syed Hussein), irks Imaan when he belittled her play. Trying to make up for it, Ian woos Imaan to teach him how to act, so that he can play the main act of reciting the poem in her play, titled Sepi. Ian finds himself smitten to her. Imaan slowly find herself falling slowly head over heels for Ian, who is sincere in his feelings toward her. Needless to say, Khalif is not amused.....

At first, the story doesnt seem engaging. The storyline is OK, but it seems to me like on of those run-of-the-mill stories of college puppy loves. The acting is top-notch however. Eventhough to me, Afdlin is the best actor in this movie, but Vanida's character is a bit serious. Baizura & Syed's characters on the other hand, has more playful banters and sweet exchanges between them. Baizura's acting has always been a charm, esp after seeing her for about 4 minutes in Cinta. She can portray child-like charm, sweetness, and seriousness in one go. Syed is also another good actor. He seems to be made for his role, a playboy who renounces his ways when he meets Imaan and is sincere in his love. You can sense that he's a playboy once, but has turned over a new leaf, and is really fighting hard to win Imaan's love. Pierre Andre, on the other hand, returns as another morose and introvert character, like his character in Cinta, Taufik. I guess his acting is adequate, because it is difficult for me to gauge his character, which is one-dimensional.

What makes the third story really ticks, is the last third of the story. What has been hitherto unremarkable storyline, changes into a shocking conclusion. (SPOILER ALERT: spoilers in red)




It is revealed that the reason Khalif was morose and introvert all the time is because he is already dead. He was only the imaginations of Imaan in the movie, who refused to accept the fact that he has died in a mugging. Suddenly, all the weird things in Imaan's storyline is explained, such as why a fellow passenger in the train was gazing pityingly at Imaan when she was "talking" with Khalif, and why Ian also puts on a sad face when Imaan remarked "My boyfriend is waiting to pick me up."
Khalif was being morose, because he wishes for Imaan to let him go, so that she can have a new life. When the truth is revealed, the revelation feels a lot like The Sixth Sense. You also feel sorry for Imaan, because she turns out to be the loneliest character in Sepi.




Sepi ultimately has a simple story to tell, which is encapsulated in its nebulous tagline...."Cinta tak datang hanya sekali."
I went to see it with the impression that it will be a sad movie thru and thru (with a title like that, surely the main theme will be "loneliness" to the hilt, rite?).

But it was not so.

The movie IS about loneliness, but it is foistered with a message of hope.
In Adam's story, it is about not giving up, always believing that the person who is meant for you is just around the corner, waiting for you.
In Sufi's case, it is about patience to wait for the right time to be together, undying love, and sincerity for the well-being of the person you care for, even if your love is not returned.
And in Imaan's case, it is about letting go of the past, and living for the present, and finding love again.
And the conclusion of all three stories is good. It might not be all happy endings, for some people, but it is the best way to end things, if the stories is taken to consideration.

But even a simple story, with good execution, good acting all around, stellar cinematography, and nice sounds, will translate into an excellent movie. And Sepi is one. A romantic movie which can make me cry many times during its length is a good one in my book. The best Malaysian movie in years, P Ramlee ones not withstanding.

And when the credits roll, with the outstanding Anuar Zain belting out Mungkin, IMO was the best way to end it all.

All is not lost for the Malaysian film industry.

See Sepi if you has its CDs.

You wont regret it.

Wassalam.

Drive to succeed...

Assalamualaikum & good morning,

The new semester has just started, which practically means that I have only less than 6 months before entering the hospitals. Gosh! Time really flies. Having enough knowledge about the workings of the human body now is wishful thinking!

My nature has always been governed by my current will & strength of conviction. That's why I have moments of youthful energy & exuberance (akin to the Renaissance) , and then it flips to downright shocking periods of extreme laziness. (the Great Depression?hehe)

Now, the key for me to become a beneficial & achieving person, is to harness the energy of exuberance when it appears, & try to prevent myself from flipping to the Dark Side again.

Ramadhan's peeking around the corner. O Allah, please let that be an impetus for me to really change for the better.

And hopefully the change is permanent this time around.

Wassalam.

Tagged by dear Phaik Hsia

Assalamualaikum & good day..

Taking a cue from Kepam, who am I not to say yes to Phaik Hsia, one of the dearest human to ever walk on Earth..? (^^)

Well, here goes...

tagged by Phaik Hsia!

So,here goes:

TAG #1
The rules:
1. Link to your tagger and post these rules.
2. List eight (8) random facts about yourself.
3. Tag eight people at the end of this post and list their names.


Eight random facts about myself

1. I like cute animals, cute here is subjective to my interpretation (^^), e.g. cats, rabbits, hamsters, Wisterian white mice, etc.

2. I like to memorize trivial things and oddities, such as movie lines that piques my interest, e.g. Batman Begins' : Why do we fall sir? We fall so that we may rise again. or Iron-Man's: Proof that Tony Stark still has a heart. or Lion King's: Gee, he looks blue. I say brownish-gold. No, no, I mean he's depressed. O. So, what's eating you, kid? Nothing, he's AT THE TOP OF THE FOOD CHAIN! THE FOOD CHAIN!! (laughs weakly) The memorization is not an active effort, it is subconsciously done. ( I wish I can do the same thing about my studies though )

3. Never had a girl friend. ( but lots of great woman friends, of which I am grateful for their friendship )

4. I have a phobia of creepy-crawlies (insects, arachnoids, etc) especially big ones.. and a mortal fear of heights.

5. All time favourite actors include: Tom Hanks, Robin Williams, Jack Nicholson, Anthony Hopkins
If actresseses include: Meg Ryan, Sandra Bullock, Meryl Streep, Resse Witherspoon

6. I don't have a well-defined or set personality. My personality is influenced by mood and my state of faith.

7. Like musics which soothe my head, and having a message is a plus. Again, 'soothing' here is subjective. Favourite songs include Sebelum Terlena-Hijjaz, Reflection-Christina Aguilera, Lelaki Ini -Anuar Zain, Manusia Bodoh-ADA Band, etc.

8. I like to eat. And I am partial to most foods, with only a few real dislikes, e.g petai.


TAG #2
Instructions:
Remove 1 question from below, and add in your personal question to make it a total of 20 questions.


1. What do you want the most now?
To be a pious Muslim (bertaqwa), and a human being which benefits others.

2. If you can have one more dream come true, what would it be? choose one: cure the environment from global warming and pollution, a cure for cancer, end wars and violence..
End wars and violence. Humans should not be killing each other. It is a sad situation.

3. What are you afraid to lose now?
My faith to Allah.

4. Do you believe in being in love forever?
Yes.

5. If you meet someone you love, would you confess to him/her?
Yes, when the timing is right.

6. What would you do when you're feeling down and depressed?
Pray, take a walk, talk to friends. listen to music...

7. Which type of person do you hate the most?
Hypocrites.

8. Do you cherish every single of your friendships?
Each and everyone. Every human has positive sides, we just have to look for them.

9. Do you believe in God?
Yes.

10. What do you think is the most important thing in your life?
My loved ones.

11. Do you find it necessary for you to have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
Not necessary. I don't think I am ready for a relationship anyway. I still have many weaknesseses that need to be addressed and improved upon. When the time is right...

12. What do you want your friends to be like?
To be themselves. To love and accept who they are.

13. What kind of friend do you hope to be in your friends' eyes?
A kind, considerate. loving friend.

14. If you can have a change, which part of your character would you like to change?
To always love myself, and seek to improve on my negatives, and strengthening my positives.

15. Would you die in order to save the ones you love?
Yes.

16. What would you do if you've lost everything in one shot?
Accept is as God's decree, and believe whole-heartedly, that there is a silver lining in it. God (Allah) knows best.

17. What would u do if your 'friends' are not really your friends anymore?
Life goes on...

18. What do you see yourself as in the next 5 years?
A tired, overworked junior doctor. But content and fulfilled. Might be a doting uncle. Filial son.

19. When do u think is the best time for you to set up a family?
The best time is relative. Set up a family whenever you feel that you are ready, in terms of maturity and financial.

20. My question: What are your most poignant/memorable childhood memories?
The 8 random people I want to tag:
1. Zaid Hakim
2. Gunaseelan
3. Re-an
4. Kak Fied
5. Njo Njo
6. Ravi
7. Shen Yew
8. Sujen